Sunday, 10 June 2007

Sorry

So sorry I haven't posted any pics of my show yet and I have also not looked at any of my alerts.

I feel so wierd - I think Im a bit depressed or something - I have not been very well for the past couple of days. I have felt really really groggy like you do when you've taken loads of pain killers but felt like it constantly. Very very tired and very sad.

I should be happy and elated this is a new beginning to my life.  Why do I feel so depressed and that everyone is against me.  I snapped at everyone yesterday (tears falling as I write). John woke up this morning early and said he was going fishing with the boys - I cried and cried - why? I could have gone with them but no I get all funny and say no Ive got loads to do here pointing to the pile of washing up and the kids school uniforms to get ready. Why the hell didnt I just smile and say oooh thats nice how lovely I will come (now Im really crying!) Whats wrong with me Im so so sad I want to cry and cry all the time and John is really cross with me now - he doesnt understand he thinks Im just spoiling their fun - Im not I just dont know what to do with myself. Then I stop feeling sad and get all moody and think oh why dont you all just clear off and leave me alone!

John just left for fishing and said to me why dont you come? I said no Im not coming but really I wanted to go!!!

Oh dear - I really dont know what to do with myself.

Laine xxxxx

7 comments:

jlocorriere05 said...

It sounds like a backlash of all the stress you've been under. Over the past few weeks you've had so much to do and have had to keep going but now it's over, it's just your body coming down from all that adrenaline that's been pumping through it! You'll feel better soon; poor John, I hope he realises you aren't being a party pooper and need a bit of time to just get back to normal! Jeannette xx  http://journals.aol.co.uk/jlocorriere05/Welcometomytravels/  

jeadie05 said...

Its just as Jeannette says ,you have been on a high for the last few weeks ,now its over ,its a bit of an anticlimax you'll feel better soon ,enjoy the day, without the fellows to chill ...love Jan xx

sdrogerson said...

Don't worry about it - there is a terrible flatness in life after you have done your degree - not the elationyou expect - it will pass give it time - it is almost like grief

sunflowerkat321 said...

You have been running full steam for weeks.  This is a normal letdown that follows a big event that you've been working towards.  Your degree is completed.  It's time to shift gears and that is emotionally taxing.  This will pass.  Don't beat yourself up.

sarajanesmiles said...

Would it help any to talk to your friends, those in the same boat as you, degree finished.  Maybe they are feeling the same way?
Hope this passes soon for you m'dear.
Have a ((((( )))))
Sara   xxx

ally123130585918 said...

Laine I just read all of the other comments and couldn't agree with them more ~ I am sure this feeling will soon pass ~ you have been on a high for so long and now all the studying is over ~ and exams finished ~ you must feel lost ~ but remember as one door closes another one opens and an even better one ~ Ally x

egre328 said...

Oh dear, I have been there too.  You want to do something yet stop yourself......I couldn't understand it.  All I can say is that you have been focused for so long now and, although the pressure is off in one way, it isn't until you get your results!  At least the boys and John went off happily on their fishing trip and will no doubt come back home full of what they caught (or didn't).  Try not to waste energy on crying, just understand it for what it is, just a blip because of all the hard work and pressure you have been under.  ~Things will get better, don't lose heart.  Eileenx